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• Today is Return of the Jedi's 30th anniversary. Celebrate by making amends with your father, then burning him on a pyre. 1 hour ago
• RT @cookdandbombd: Blood on one hand, two weapons in the other. He's just used them to murder a soldier. ITV NEWS EXCLUSIVE! IT'S OUR EXC… 12 hours ago
• RT @EllenPage: Silly kittens!!! #cute http://t.co/DzGMtWHVN5 14 hours ago
• Current-era Stallone in shirtless fight scenes is visually identical to a raging erection being violently wanked. 14 hours ago
• Will Arnett's been in more pilots than John Travolta. 15 hours ago
• Boris being 'taught how to rap' by Will Smith at a public event. Forever the headmaster dressed as a Spice Girl at the end of term assembly. 17 hours ago
• RT @RBcomedian: Have a blessed day people http://t.co/I6xb3Gvjan 20 hours ago
• Why is @GarethAveyard trending? *light-switch that looks a little bit like a face* 20 hours ago
• Men, a word of warning -- when chatting up a mermaid, don't refer to her mouth as 'your blowhole' 21 hours ago
• What sucks is that guy is Roddy's doctor. "I had a ticket anyway. Thought I'd save you the phonecall." twitpic.com/cstyxa 21 hours ago