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• "are you in the right headspace to receive some information that could possibly hurt you?" ME: when did my bathroom mirror learn to talk?! 37 minutes ago
• "...suggesting it’s the John Leslie from 1994, put into cryogenic stasis in an effort to save Earth’s mightiest spe… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 9 hours ago
• RT @franticplanet: [Courtroom, Christmas Eve] LAWYER: I put it to you, the 'egg' Robin laid was actually a poo, and was itself the cause o… 23 hours ago
• https://t.co/JEtJo1EnXr 1 day ago
• Attention, Christmas cracker manufacturers, I will sell you this joke for £25: Q: Which elderly philosopher sits a… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 2 days ago
• Hiring an intern to reply to all these "what's something you say during x and also during sex?" tweets. 2 days ago
• RT @barneyfarmer: https://t.co/IrN5A82y45 2 days ago
• RT @franticplanet: Earnest 80's wackiness, "a load of wallies" up the Telecom Tower, and the Krankies' pagan sex-magick rituals at 30,000ft… 2 days ago
• Thought this picture of Barry off Eastenders in the Elf musical was Liza Minnelli. https://t.co/A8R6nV6j5R 2 days ago
• This week's post examines ITV's Saturday night space-trash game show, Scavengers, which finally answered the questi… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 2 days ago